Dating Tips For Losers Like Me

If you've seen the hilarious movie "The 40 Year Old Virgin" then you know hooking up can be quite challenging if you've never done it before. Even if you have had sex by some miracle years ago and are now 35 living at home, the act of finding a partner for love or fun is quite daunting if you haven't brushed up on your dating skills. Here are a few tips and tricks to get you back in the love groove so you don't end up living a Unibomber-esque solitary life....hoodie, beard, aviator glasses, scary cabin in the woods, and all.

1. Go To Places You Like: That same anxiety people get from public speaking can handcuff your personality if you're in an environment that makes you feel uncomfortable. Why go to a nightclub if you don't enjoy dancing? Why go to a pub if you're not a drinker? By hanging out at places that appeal to your tastes you feel more at ease with yourself making it easier to strike up a conversation if the situation calls for it. Hey, you might even meet someone with similar interests. What a concept!

2. Be Selfless: Self preservation tells us to think of ourselves before we think of others. Unfortunately, this natural instinct sometimes goes beyond the acquisition of basic needs like food or shelter and becomes a fatal flaw to many of our personalities. Don't press your opinions or ideals on other people. Instead let them shine, unless you're a pimp or preacher and harbor helpless victims seeking love any which way they can get it. People love a good listener especially if you can hold a conversation longer than a discussion on weather on today's weather forecast.

3. Don't Rush Things: I'm guilty of getting too far ahead of the dating game sometimes and I end up being disappointed if situations don't go my way. Life naturally progresses and dates or meetings with a person of interest should be the same. Sure there are those moments when you ask yourself "Should I go for the kiss?" and the situation will determine the choice, but the rules aren't always the same as each person is different. One day you might feel brave and the next you may not. Take the date or experience as it comes. Maybe the 1st meeting will end with a handshake but if you make a good impression the second might end with a kiss... or a home run?

4. Hold A Conversation: Like # 2, it's crucial to be a good listener. It's equally important to be interesting via what you say about yourself. A combination of these two key conversational elements can turn you into a Casanova overnight. Now you don't have to be the funniest person nor the coolest person, but you should definitely be able to relate to what your date is saying while expanding on the tone with your own experiences. Think tennis. One person serves while the other returns and it goes back and forth until somebody scores. So score already!

5. Use Props: Most stand-up comics frown on other comedians using props because it gives a certain advantage. I guess it's like cheating on a test by having a sheet of notes tucked into your sleeve. I say props are good for dating because they add an additional element to the conversation. "What kind of props are you talking about?" you're asking. Like a mechanical bull. Let's say you're at a country bar or restaurant having lunch with somebody. There's a mechanical bull in the corner staring at you. Why not jump aboard and give it a shot for laughs? You may look like a complete idiot or you may turn out to be more like John Travolta in "Urban Cowboy", either way you'll have something to talk about for the next 20 minutes and you won't be the wimp that was afraid to take risks. Nobody likes a wimp, right?